it´s a sad day...

well not just one day..but mostly everyday.. and now with Christmas just around the corner it´s even worse :(

I can´t help but think what it´s gonna be like.. how are we gonna handle it.. it´s tough you know..

as I was passing by the stores I kept looking at men stuff.. needless to say I choked everytime I saw something you might´ve liked.. I eventually ended walking like if I had a blindfold so I could not see anything like that..

I too went to our house to get some stuff and saw a few gifts I had saved over time.. now realizing you won´t get to use them..and also thinking "was it worth it for me to buy ahead?".. now I think it wasn´t.. remember those cufflinks you had looked for over like a year?.. well I found and got them.. I wish I had given them to you so you could have at least wore them while you were here :´(..

the shirts, the shoes and even the suits are still in their boxes/bags and some even with tags.. I guess they´ll sit there for another 10+ yrs until our boy can fit.. hopefully he´ll be willing to.. I´d hate for the to waste.. but then again, even if unused I can´t seem to part with anything.. not even a sock..

maybe I´m a bit paranoid.. I still have your toothbrush..and even your hairbrush.. I don´t even want to toss a hair.. I want to keep as much of you as I can.. even if it´s plain crazy...I knoe nothing will bring you back.. but I just don´t wanna let go.. I really don´t..

I know I´m not alone.. and not the only one.. but it sure feels like that some times...

I miss you..